It took me a year and a half of that to realize the extent of my mistakes.

I thought about how it would have been different if we had met now.

Then I said

But we did not.

Then I said

But if we had, I would have been her. Because I was her.

Just not until now.

Now, whenever I think of you, I pray for your happiness.

That you find the her for you.

That you find happiness in everything you do.

As for me,

Sometimes, just sometimes,

I wish I could talk to you.

Once.

That way, my heart would find peace.

That long-awaited peace.